roman picisan

“..and love only taught me to protect you even from myself. It is love, purified with fire, that steps me from following you to the farthest land. Love kills my desire so that you may live freely and virtuously. Limited love asks for possession of the beloved, but the unlimited asks for itself. Love that comes between the naivete’ and awakening of youth satisfies itself with possessing, and grows with embraces. But love which is born in the firmaments lap and has descended with night’s secrets is not contended with anything but eternity and immortality; it does not stand reverently before anything except deity…”

My heart touched by Selma’s sentence…even her body buried somewhere near the pain forest in Beirut; hundred years ago……but her words just like butterflies that wander around my thoughts ..

Words that devotes my heart to reconstruct…exhausting though, but in the end it suppose makes me u’stand what is life and love..rite??

Consult me if im wrong… but life is full with an option..the problem arise when u must choose… as we, who seek both happiness ………. Should try to understand….

Regret is just fear… risk-taker should not regret…he just a man who search for his dream, just let him fly.. even his wings were broken..just let him fly plsss…

pray above his pray to God … to mend his broken wings… Amin Ya Rabbal-Alamin

then absolutely i would…

felt this complete loneliness…makes it all turns dissolved and indefinite.. why do people keep judging by only physics and appearance… carry my heart towards loneliness.. is it my fault if i try to kept it as an ironic?? this is me.. so plsss let it be…

do people always like that?? Blaming and criticize for a fault… do not tryin to settle all by considering pro and contra before-mentioned… strictly tired and no ‘chakura’ left in me… yah! Che’normah say I should stop that inner-critics in me… maybe shes rite.. critics from the outsiders should enough… so plsss let it be..

distance was seen as a major causes.. but for me the distance made between the 2 hearts is totally far compared to any number on the map… lots adumbrate fall on me, sights that appear few times in mist…I try not to lost again… so plsss let it be…

everyday was an overcast here in my place… seems like it understand whats in my head… huh! But if Id given the choices… I prefer it will be a blue skies with few bunch of white cute-clouds hovers slowly from east… so plsss let it be…

raining that falls this early morning really makes both my body and soul felt numb and cold…so theres no blue sky and white cute clouds calming my heart today…in present i really wish i had my own wings, fly over that black clouds… if i could? ….i really miss her…my tended ‘blue-cardigan’..huhuhuhuh!!

its feels just as empty wheter youre here or not…crying silently, i feel as hallow as your eyes…for a while i was able to pretend..but all my smiles were fake…slowly realizing that this is killing me…cant u see my pain?? or maybe u dont care…

the silence between us only makes it worse…

the cracks are forming…

im reaching the end of this desolate road as the edge grows near…will u mourn me??miss me?? maybe it doesnt really matter..i juts want to step over the edge…

my artificial lover…i have no more love to give..

…kejujuran itu mmg sangat menyakitkan…tapi itulah hakikatnya…